Molly Sterling on releasing their first track in five years, writing music on their own terms, and life in Co Clare

'Sometimes songs are little lessons that come to visit you just to keep an eye'

It’s been a few years since we last heard from singer-songwriter Molly Sterling - five, to be precise, since their last track ‘Feeble’ - so what a treat to get a new song this week. It’s called ‘Strong Leech’ and like their previous tracks, it’s a showcase of what a stunning voice they have. Over gentle, lulling piano and cello, recorded by Sterling (the cello is played by Fionnuala Ní Dhiscín), they sing that “it was all a dream anyway, it didn’t feel real anyway”. It sounds like it was a tough song to process, but hopefully the start of a fruitful time ahead for Sterling. I asked them a few questions about what they’ve been up to in the intervening five years, how it was coming back to releasing music, and their plans for the short term.

You can listen to ‘Strong Leech’ here.

It's been five years since your last release ('Feeble'). Did you know around that release that you'd be taking a break from making or releasing music? 
It has been five years, yeah! How did that happen?! Life is so long and so short, eh!? I digress, haha! No, not at all. I distinctly remember thinking that the release of ‘Feeble’ was the start of ‘the next phase’ of my career. I’m not even sure what I meant by that. Maybe a sense of progress is what I was feeling. 

During the year that I released ‘Feeble’, I got booked to support one of my favourite artists at the time, Matt Corby, in Vicar Street. Normally the room is chatty and half full for a support slot - that’s what you’re signing up for so you just focus on tuning into your own space. I only realised halfway through the set that the audience was incredibly attentive and the room was full. It’s one of my favourite memories. I remember feeling like it was just the start. And that was the last gig of my own that I played until 2023! 

I saw you playing with Nealo in the Kino in Cork around then. Was it important to still be around other musicians and on stage even while you were taking a break from your own stuff? 
Oh my god, I just had to google that gig there to double check that it actually happened - it was part of Sounds from a Safe Harbour, did you know that?! I’ve always wanted to play that festival. I had such an emotional time during the SFSH last year, it really lifted my spirit and brought some realisations to the surface. Anyway, it just shows how you can be part of something that you’ve always wanted to be connected to and if you’re not in the headspace to take it in, then it’s as if it never happened. 

Back to your question though. Yes, I think the time I spent performing and writing with other artists enabled me to try out genres of music that I love without the pressure of the project being my baby. Those two genres being hip-hop and Punk were important too I think, because they are types of music where you are given permission to take up so much space. In fact, it feels awkward if you don’t take up that space. It was extremely uncomfortable at first, I didn’t know what to do with myself on stage at all, but after a while I felt incredible things on stage that I had never felt with my own music. It was also my first time not being the solo artist in a group, so it’s important to switch up those roles and give yourself a bit of perspective and maturity in that sense. I have to say, the whole Vernon Jane crew, especially Emily, have been so integral to my growth, not just as an artist but as a human. It was a dream to be asked to work with them. They remodelled so many experiences in the music scene that I had only had toxic encounters with in the past. What amazing people. Best band in the world! Go listen to their music, and go to see their live shows.

You say in the press release that you've "taken the space and time to decide how they wanted to share music again, making sure that this time round will be on their terms or not at all". Did it not feel like you had this power before when releasing music? You started releasing music when you were just a teenager… 
I find myself really wanting to be open here, but also feeling a strong sense of needing to check in with myself around how much I want to disclose. I would say that it’s less that I didn’t feel like I had this power and more that the power I had was taken from me. In order to keep myself safe, I sacrificed my personal and artistic power. And I didn’t even know that’s what was happening until I took a step back from everything that was my norm: music, environment, relationships. 

When I started writing music. For myself. It was always on my terms and I had such a strong sense of vision and artistic integrity. I’m talking about when I was 15 years and younger. Once I started doing music competitions and the music I was writing became something that was either winning or losing, everything changed. There was a few years of chaos and it got very dark for me. I’m so grateful to the musicians who came into my life after that time. They were so committed and so kind. But I didn’t understand how long it takes to recover from that kind of darkness and I was still pretty traumatised from my past when I was working with them. Now every year that goes by when I think about those musicians who played and recorded music with me from when I was 18 until I was about 21, my gratitude for them grows exponentially. By being there in the room with me, working through those songs, they were helping me process things that I didn’t even consciously know were there. Ah, they’re such good eggs. Really mighty people. 

The problem though was that I didn’t know what I was progressing towards. It felt a bit like I was strapped into a seat on a train but I didn’t know where the train was going. Sometimes that feeling can be exciting, but when you feel afraid of the towns you’re passing through (to overuse the train analogy!) then it becomes quite claustrophobic very quickly. 

I saw you supporting Vernon Jane - another act you made music with - at the Grand Social almost a year ago. You did a series of small shows called A Celebration of Stepping Back In around that time too. What were they like? 
You did, you were so good to come to that gig! God that was very scary for me. Fair play to Joe Panama and Shane Murphy for keeping me from legging it off stage with the fear, haha! They have such a steady and safe presence. I adore those boys. 

A Celebration of Stepping Back In. Well! Those shows are the most healing thing I’ve ever done. I had to take time away from music, for lots of reasons. The tour started out as the first solo show that I’d done in four years. I called it A Celebration of Stepping Back In, and it was in Maureen’s Pub in Cork. I then took A Celebration of Stepping Back In on tour, with the aim of celebrating the process of needing to step away from something that you love because it might not be the best thing for you at that time. And connecting with people through that universal feeling. The show consisted of interactive music performances and discussion. I took it through Galway, Clare, Cork and Kerry with an emphasis on cultivating community through music, in non-traditional music spaces 

It was very scary for me to play my music in front of a crowd again. So, the idea behind this show was to disrupt the structure of how an audience member and a performer interact with each other. I don’t even like saying that I engage in a ‘performance’ because I actually really hate the concept of that. For me, it’s way easier to put on a performance than to be myself. That’s part of why I got so lost in music before (not in the good way!). So, I wanted to challenge myself to show up. Don’t code it as anything else. Just tell people - “here, I’m petrified but I want to share these stories with you so…will you come along and share something about yourselves also to make it less scary for everyone?”. People who came to the gig would write down something that they were stepping back in to, we put it into a shoebox that I painted and we read out people’s contributions throughout the gig. Almost using them as prompts for conversations that we’d have throughout the show. By the time it was over there was so much love in the room. So, that’s why I ended up taking that format and trying it in alternative venues across a few different counties. 

Everyone comes at this music thing differently. For me now, it’s about questioning everything about the industry. It’s about how can I best connect with these people in the room while remaining myself, and how can I disrupt the focus? 

Tell me about 'Strong Leech'. Have you had the song a while? How was the creative process? 
IMPOSSIBLE TO WRITE ABOUT ‘STRONG LEECH’ WITHOUT USING ALL CAPS BECAUSE I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT IT. SORRY I KNOW IT’S NOT VERY AESTHETICALLY PLEASING BUT I CAN’T HELP IT!!! 

Okay, I’ll reign myself in there now. 

I have had ‘Strong Leech’ in my back pocket for five years. The first time I played it on stage was that Vicar Street gig in 2019. It was a very important song for me to write because it told me a lot about myself and what I needed at that time. There is no way to escape your gut feeling, that’s what this song has taught me. Sometimes songs are little lessons that come to visit you just to keep an eye, y’know - like a little robin! 

The creative process has been so liberating because this song has not touched a studio. I realised over the past few years actually that I really don’t like studios, and I didn’t think you were allowed to not like them. But it turns out that you’re kinda allowed to do whatever you like if it’s best for the song. That whole learning curve has been very exciting. I recorded the vocals, piano and cello myself. The haunting cello is played by the incredibly talented Fionnualla Ní Dhiscín in Cork City. I was so lucky to get to spend some time at The Beekeepers in Ballyvaughan, Clare, where I recorded the piano and vocals. Daithí and Norma have created the dream space there, if you haven’t been I’d say get yourself there asap! Then the wizard that is Caolán Austin, based in Derry, has worked his magic in terms of sound design, production and mixing. I’ve worked with Caolán since 2018, (‘Stripped Down’, ‘Feeble’) and it’s been an absolute buzz to work with him again. He has an almost mind reader quality in terms of production and is a ridiculously groovy artist in his own right. I’m pretty sure he might actually be a wizard. There’s no other way to explain it. Caolán suggested we work with Katie Tavini from Weird Jungle on the mastering and I was just really into her ethos and her roster of artist’s is very spicy too! 

You tease, in the press release, that an EP will be following - I'm presuming maybe next year. Are you excited about releasing music again? 
Yes, the ball is well and truly rolling. I’m hoping to release one more single this year in collaboration with a very exciting Irish artist. The EP will be next year though, yes. As you know sure,summer is full of all sorts of shenanigans so I’m quite looking forward to a winter where I can be a little musical hermit. I’ll be working on music with Caolán and with my class bandmates, Joe Panama and Shane Murphy.

The style is a little bit different in the sense that I’ve been experimenting with different attitudes through my lyrics. There is a distinct change of tone in terms of who the onus is on. I think the music I used to write was very self-blaming, and I needed to go through that. But I’m no longer afraid to point fingers where they deserve to be cast. 

I am beyond excited! I’m sharing music and it feels blatant now, it’s not secretly for any other reason. I am not putting it out into the world with the unspoken caveat of hoping I will then be accepted as a person if people like my music. That’s what stepping away from releasing and touring music has given me. The gift of separating my sense of self worth from my music. 

Tell me about life in Clare, where you're based at the moment. It sounds like it's pretty fulfilling? 
Ah, Clare - mo chroí! I don’t even know what to say about Clare that hasn’t already been said. I’ll send you some pictures. Lol. 

Clare has rejuvenated me as an artist and as a human. I have very visceral memories of driving back from Clare on the motorway and crying because I didn’t want to leave. Very toddler-esque behaviour like but very telling all the same! And sure now I live there! Well,  between there, Inis Oírr and Cork. Bit of a nomadic existence at the moment but I haven’t hit the adventure fatigue just yet. I’ll find myself a little spot for the Winter and give myself time to be in one place for a while. 

I spent some time volunteering up at Moy Hill farm during the spring, I’m very grateful to the amazing crew up there for welcoming me on a very sporadic basis! We planted some trees and I cried. I had never planted trees before, it’s a very emotive thing. You’re literally planting for a future that will outlive you. It’s a very humbling practice. 

What else am I up to there… well I was buzzin’ to be involved in a very cool artists collective called Design Bank that is just getting itself up and running in Miltown Malbay. Keep your eyes peeled for more on that. Aoife O’Malley who runs the space is just a complete gem. It’s been a privilege to work with her. 

Other than that, I’ve spent some time working with the young people through music in the Ennistymon Family Resource Centre. Few plates, few projects! 

Every time I am in Clare, there are these magical memories made. It’s quite normalised there, to be living life as an artist. For that to be your priority. The more I’m around that kind of energy, the more at home in myself that I feel. And West Clare is just somewhere that makes sense for my creative practice - where I consider the land and sea to be my collaborators. It’s the place where I feel all the parts of my creative practice can be connected and live harmoniously!

Finally, what music by Irish artists have you been enjoying lately. 
Where to start! There are so many incredible Irish artists who I adore. Really, it’s the artist’s with such strong integrity who live their values - that makes their music sound even better to my ears! A few that come to mind who I can’t stop listening to are… 

Eithne 
Vernon Jane 
Roisín El Cherif 
CMAT 
Clare Sands 
Niamh Regan 
ØXN 
Junior Brother 
Síomha 
Eoghan Ó Ceannabháin 

Their music is living completely rent free in my head at all times!